“I wanted to spice up my sex life with my husband, so I suggested we have another man in bed with us.”
This is how a woman’s letter to Dear Deidre, The Sun’s sex and relationship counselor, begins.
“He found the idea exciting. We agreed that he would not have sex with the man himself. He still said that it would be sexy to see me with another man. ”
The woman and her husband found a man online who was ready to have a threesome with them. He came to them six times.
“It was a lot of fun and we all found it very exciting. But then we did not hear from the man for a few months – or so my husband said. ”
The woman is 33 years old, her husband is 35 years old and the man is 28 years old.
“We have been married for six years and have a two-year-old daughter. We usually get along well, but sometimes it’s like we’re in a completely different place where my husband’s work is very demanding, “she says.
“But recently he has been very distant. I thought it was just because of workload but I was taking clothes to the dry cleaner and found a letter around a condom in his pocket. I then thought he was passing me by with a woman. But then I was looking for a picture of our daughter on his phone and found a video of the man we were dating.
You can not see my husband’s face, but I know his voice. I was shocked. ”
The woman says she has not said anything to her husband. “But I think he knows it’s not all there is to it. I’m so confused about whether my husband and I are in an open relationship, “she says.
“I’ve only talked to one friend who says I can not complain about my husband’s behavior because it was originally my idea to add someone to our sex life. Should I just take this or talk to him? ”
Deidre says:
“If ever there was a saying, ‘Take care of what you want,’ it is now. As you may have noticed, adding someone to your sex life can easily lead to adversity for one of you.
But you got permission from your husband when you went to the threesome, he went behind you. Maybe your husband discovered some homosexual feelings. You should talk to each other. Tell him what you accidentally found on his phone and that you need to talk about it.
It may well be that he himself is very confused about his sexuality and is ashamed. “